April 30, 2004 - 8:11 AM

Hey Fuckheads! It�s F R I D A Y !!!!!

So, HELL YEAH!

And, guess what? This morning, so far, has been the ONLY morning, since LAST FRIDAY, where I didn�t feel the need to lie down in a comatose fashion on the crappy gray carpet of my office in fear of sudden death!

So, HELL YEAH again!

HELL YEAH to the NINTH POWER!

Or pi, or infinity.

You get the idea.

A very nice thing happened yesterday, this nice boy put me as a permanent fixture on the right hand side of his page. Kinda like Peter�s position on the Brady Bunch Squares of Death.

I can look to my right and grin all stupidly at The Boy. I can also look lovingly up and down at the folks above and below me. I could look to my left, but what for? There�s just a scroll bar.

But I digress. It was a nice thing to do, and I�m sure I don�t deserve it, but that�s his problem and not mine. Oh, also, I am NOT a badass.

In addition to that very nice thing, another nice person linked me. So, muchos gracias mi amigo.

So, shout outs to those who rock.

Or fat bottomed girls. Shout outs to you my homegirls. Those of the fat bottom! My people!

(Can you tell I�m feeling better?)

Now, my dad had a big one.

In fact, he still does.

We used to marvel at it.

In fact, we still do.

He points to it and rubs it and then he laughs.

Especially at my brothers�. As they can relate. Theirs are huge as well. And, as they get older, theirs get huger.

Tyra also has a big one.

In fact, her�s is HUGE!!!

But it works for Tyra.

I mean, she�s like a supermodel or some shit.

I also have a huge one.

I call it my �five head�.

Which is more than a forehead.

As a child, I would always wear bangs. My bangs had to be LONG in order to provide adequate coverage for my five head.

I frequently looked like that kid Oliver from the Brady Bunch. My hair all level with my eyes.

I looked like a boy anyway. Seventies style hair. All strait and flat and covering my eyes.

My grandma, who did not have a huge one, would always complain.

�Get that damn hair out of your eyes! Why can�t you make your hair nice like your friend Shannon! Look how nice HER hair is!�

My friend Shannon always got the attention. She was the prettier, blonde one.

She also got boobs about 3 years before me.

But she was stupid. So I did have one up on her.

But she got all the guys and my grandma. So she had more up on me it seems.

Bottom line, and all childhood psychological and emotional damage aside, when I got my first boyfriend, he helped me learn to love my five head. He encouraged me to wear my hair back.

He brought me my five head confidence.

And now, even though I still marvel at my five head and how large and shiny and acne prone it is, I love it.

My five head.

Yay.

Oh, and no matter what this picture implies:

I hate candy.

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