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April 10, 2004 - 8:17 AM

Easter Related

When my kids have to do chores, I like to make it fun for them...like making a game of it.

My proudest parental scheming into making them have fun at doing crap they dislike has to be what I recently came up with for the most distasteful job they have.

Picking up the dogs' poo.

I got my 8 year old out there and excitedly and animatedly explained to him that it was just like Easter egg hunting....only the eggs weren't very colorful and they smelled pretty bad.

"Look! There's one!" I say.

:::runs over excitedly and picks up the poo and puts it into my plastic bag "basket":::

My son staring blankly at me.

"Come on! Pretend your sister is out here too. You can't let her get all the eggs!"

"Mom. It's poo."

Like I don't know this.

"Oh, come on!" I say..."Pretend!"

I take a studious glance around the backyard....

"Look! Another one! Come on! Before your sister gets it!"

:::grabs his hand and runs toward a turd::::

"Pick it up! Put it in the basket!" I urge.

He gives me The Look. The "I have the most stupidest mom" look.

Reluctantly, he picks it up and drops it in my bag. Er, basket.

"OOh...that was a big one! I bet it has a lot of candy inside! Come on, there's more!"

::Now I'm running around our grass all excited like I want as much poo as possible::

"I'm gonna get more than you!" I say, grabbing a dry pile, my face filled with joy as I place it in my bag.

Finally, my son is getting my idiocy and he sees how stupid I'm being and he's smiling.

"No way!" he yells, "Lookit THIS one!" he says arriving at a huge chunky brown "egg". "This one has a Reese's in it!" he exclaims, knowing it's my favorite candy.

"Darn!" I reply. "I didn't see that one!" I say, all dissapointed like.

And it continues that way. In our backyard. On our grass. Running from turd to turd. An adult and child, happily hunting for dog poo like they were Easter eggs.

 

3 That's so headgear...

 

previous - next

Axis: Bold As Love - July 01, 2004
Downside - June 30, 2004
random crap---its monday - June 28, 2004
Quest for Feet - June 25, 2004
I Don't Heart Gnats - June 24, 2004

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